goblinbutch:

me: *is bored for 0.5 seconds*

me: i wanna learn how to work wood. i need to build a boat

cashwheel:

phantomrose96:

phantomrose96:

I read Hamlet back in high school and to this day my absolute favorite thing about it was when Guildenstern was trying to fool Hamlet into doing something or other and Hamlet’s savvy to it but rather than saying “you’re lying and trying to trick me” instead Hamlet outta nowhere whips out this flute and tells Guildenstern to play it.

And Guildenstern is all “I dont know how to play a flute, my lord”

And Hamlet takes a dramatic pause before he absolutely ruins Guildenstern with, “Well thats funny considering you thought you could play me”

this post sounds like im exaggerating but im not it’s straight up canon

fucking legendary power move

marxoids:

Me, passing someone on the highway: bitch

Me, being passed on the highway: bitch

filthy-rat:

bethanny-esda:

“i fucking hate this game” i say as i devote my entire life around it